so this past weekend,
all weekend long,
L had a test that would detect any seizures he may have.
the results of this test would help his
know exactly what is going on inside his head
when the seizures strike.
i was grateful that for the first time,
L was able to have this test at home and not in the hospital.
(do you know how much i hate hospitals?)
but i’m not sure that anyone who designed the way the test works
actually has a child of their own.
it was complicated and very, very difficult
both for L and for us.
and we could not turn our eyes away from him for a second
for fear that he would tug
the bazillions of cords cemented onto his scalp
free from their secured positions.
prior to the test, he had
10 seizures in 18 days
but during the 48 hours that he was hooked up to the test at home?
his neuro joked that this test can sometimes “cure” seizures.
and even now, he hasn’t had any seizures.
and is a constant reminder
that we don’t have any control.
i ask my heart why i keep needing to learn this lesson.
and then i remember how forgetful of that truth i really am.
so my heart is clinging to Romans 8:28
And we know that in all things
God works for the good
of those who love him,
who have been called according to his purpose.
and trusting that there was and is purpose
in this test and in the lack of seizures during it.